Monnie blog has transformed yet again.

I no longer visit here but can be found typing away here

For the new year

Hell
I have given up cigarettes.
In order to do this I'm not drinking because that makes me want to smoke.
Not smoking makes me want to eat.
I have given up sugar as well so I can't eat candy when I want to smoke.

I'll post more when the screaming has stopped.

The cure for what ails you

The little north west washington town in which I live has had a rough few weeks. The wind, she did blow and blow and blow things down. The night before we left for our jaunt to portland two feet of snow laided itself upon the ground. Thankfully the trains were still running. Upon our return the wind picked up the pace and blew our fences and power away. 5am on thursday morning I awoke to my alarm, yes I know it's an ungodly hour to awake. But this time there was an apocolyptic feel to is as the moment my alarm started to cry there was a flash of light and a loud rumbling. Thinking my alarm had actual exploded I jumped from my bed and only to be confronted with lighting striking what I would swear to be my neighbours yard. It was only a few moments untill the pebble sized hail began to fall.

Thankfully the power had only dipped and was not knocked out completely like that of many of my fellow citizens had. Not being able to face the end of the world without a cup of coffee I proceeded to fetch myself some. It had all become too much for me and in order to face the day with strength and flare I proceeded to one of the fine items I purchased while on vacation.

The brilliant red of Chanel's Passion provides that extra little magic a gal needs to face what ever man or nature might throw in here path.

I first discovered the mystical powers of Chanel reds when as a young woman I faced the demise of my first grown up relationship. Thinking the red would match my wounded heart I let myself be talked into what for a theatre student was a cosmetic that cost far too much. But when I saw the image in the mirror of the dark hair, green eyes and young fair skin with the bright red full lips, I felt better. My heart healed a little bit and I knew that there were many adventures awaiting me and my bright red lips. The samples the sales clerk, a very stylish eastern european woman tucked into the bag, like a drug peddler in a playgroud helped push me into what was to become a life long dependence on Chanel.

I was away

But now I am back. Will post more later.

The Night Fast approaches. A to do list.

blue hill( if anyone recognizes this photo let me know. I lost the create somewhere and i like to give credit where credit is due)

As tomorrow's costume party fast approaches and I being its hostess my list of to do things is rather large.
1. I must make up my damn mind what my costume will be. The options are A) scary fairy although the wings are rather large and may cause trouble and someone may lose an eye. B) Wednesday Adams but this will entail some sewing and the purchase of a wig. C) French girl (black and white checked skirt and black beret) This will allow for the chain smoking of Gauloise, the drinking of much wine and the use of a truly horrid French accent with which to annoy my friends. I’m leaning towards C because of the smoking and the accent will be fun.
2. Most prepare the black punch of death. A lethal concoction of white grape juice, vodka, black food coloring and gummy creatures. I believe once this punch is mixed it becomes a portal to the other world from which demons of sin and misdeeds appear.
3. Move the big tv into the garage for the smokers and have horror movies playing constantly. Because the Shining makes for beautiful background.
4. Decorate said garage with cobwebs and creepy bouquets of flowers, thankfully my local florist makes died black flower arrangements.
5. Create a crime scene on the driveway. So everyone will know which house is mine. Nothing says welcome like crime scene tape and a chalk body outline.
6. Start cooking the food. So my guest will have something to ward off the evils of the punch.
7. Oh yes….I must clean the house. My house would be anawful mess if not for these parties. I really should just start sending out invitations that state. I need to clean my house so come over and drink so I’m motivated lest I embarrass myself.

I am sure there are more things to do but I can't think of them now and will be running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to get everything done. Hum...maybe that should be my costume.

Many people suspect their house is haunted.

haunted library from wit of the staircase


Do your socks ever inexplicably disappear?
Have you ever felt the sensation of being watched when no one is there?
Do you ever walk into a room and forget what you went in there for?
Have you ever heard a door or cabinet door open or close mysteriously?
Have you ever seen a ghost in your house?
If you answered yes to No. 5, your house is haunted

From Mystery of the Haunted Vampire

T'is the Season

The Worms Crawl In

Never laugh when a ghost goes by—
It may be your turn next to die.
They wrap you up in a big white sheet
And throw you down, six feet deep.
All goes well for a week or two,
Then things start happening; all is new.

Worms crawl in and worms crawl out,
And ants play ping-pong on your snout.
One worm that's not quite so shy
Crawls in one ear and out one eye,
Till your blood turns to a sickery green
And oozes out like Devonshire cream.


And on that note I'm off to start the invitations rolling for my little celebrations of all things creepy and crawly and haunted and spooky. So put on that extra eyeliner and you best morbid outlock and come on down.

Happy Birthday Baby!

Yes you...it's your birthday you fabulous fellow you. Anna Wintour calls you darling but I call you my friend.
Kisses